The Four Spiritual Laws of Prosperity Day 19 Chapter 6 Forgiveness

Today we talk about forgiveness. When things keep coming up for us, we know that we still need to forgive. If emotion comes up around something then that’s an indicator that we need forgiveness work.

It’s easier for us to forgive others than it is to forgive ourselves. We tend to beat up on ourselves more than we beat up on others. However, it’s easy to blame others for our problems sometimes.

We discuss the processes we use to forgive others. We know our forgiveness work is done when we can say ‘Thank you for the lessons’ to or about that other person.

Forgiving is not letting the other person off the hook, it’s letting me off the hook. Being upset or angry about someone only hurts me, not them.

Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that we have to be around that person. I don’t have to apologize to them or let them know that I have forgiven them, but I do have to release the energy of the event from my life.

How well do you do with forgiveness? It’s a daily practice for us and we aren’t always good at it. Yet.

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  1. Stephanie Scott says

    Even writing my comment catching myself being self critical. For many years I believed and was told I was too forgiving, anger in particular is a healthy emotion and I stifle it or internalize it. The task then was to express my anger, not rage, aggression etc. Queen of denial was a role I had down well. I do not like the energy anger evokes and can let it go. Now I realize this is healthy, it felt uncomfortable when I was going against my truth. An example happened this week at work. I was so mad at a coworker who had failed to do a primary task in carrying for our client. My reaction was to email the boss and alert him or write a note in the record, where other caregivers would see about the action. I had to breathe, ask why this “got me” so much, to realize what I judged as negligence was the best this person could do at the time and not catastrophize as the truth was there was no lasting harm. Perhaps it was more about my need to be cared for well- respected and with dignity in addition to being protective of the client. By the time I got home I was not ranting and was relieved my response was not to take either of the above actions. I tend to be impulsive in what I say, often wanting to take words back as they are coming out of my mouth.

    Self forgiveness is often where I get stuck. Learning to say I have made mistakes, rather than carrying around shame is getting easier.

    Edwene made a statement which was SO powerful for me, I can hear her saying it. “What you can’t talk about will (can) kill you”. While I knew internalizing a lot of negative energy can effect a person physically, it made so much sense to why I have done all this forgiveness work in and out of therapy, yet I continued to feel I needed to explain certain actions, decisions or choices. Especially in relationships. When telling a friend I had fallen in a pattern again and was feeling ashamed, frustrated at myself a friend told me “Stephanie anything you have ever done or been has been about Love” I remind myself of this when those strong emotions arise. This friend reminds me of who I am.

    A description of forgiveness on purple paper Edwene gave us I highlighted immediately -“When you no longer feel like you have to tell your story” This put a whole new spin on it for me. This would be a way to know I made progress in self forgiveness. I would not feel the need to explain, repeat events in my past. They do not define me. HUGE

  2. Vivian Miller says

    I agree forgiveness is situational. Every day I have to practice forgiveness. I used to think I would eventually get to a state where I would not need to do it. However, I think unforgiveness is not something I snuggle up in bed with. Sometimes it takes me a few days to process the event. If it nags at me, I know it is something I need to take care of so I don’t have to carry it. One of the ways I move to forgiveness is by examining my part in the scenario. I ask myself what I could have done better to prevent the situation.

    Another thing I say to me is, “You know better so do better.” I learned in my co-dependency travels that there are no victims, but there are volunteers. I think in some instances this is true. The other thing I remind myself of is that it’s my biology when I am holding on to stuff. Do I want to be right or healthy?

    Your energy today was more upbeat. That is good. Hope you are healing steadily.

    • It wasn’t until a couple of years ago, when I was introduced to Edwene Gaines, that I woke to the knowledge that forgiveness was a daily practice. She has been wonderful Spiritual teacher and friend. It was through her descriptions of the experiences she has had, that I uncovered the un-forgiveness at the core of me. She encouraged me to dig deeper and go further. She taught me how to clean out my corners, so to speak, and because of her willingness to share, I found a profound forgiveness for my abusers.

      Funny enough, as hard as that was to go through, I find it harder these days to let go of the petty things. LOL. You would think I would be enlightened enough to “get over it”, or at least awake enough too. I recognize when I am holding onto the forgiveness and am striving to get there quicker everyday. There are some days that I just hang on to the hurt. Sliding back into the victim role. I really dislike that and am moving away from it. One day at a time.

      I really liked what you said about ‘do I want to be right or healthy’. It can be easy to forget the mind-body connection in the moment. I will remember that.

      Your perception is correct. I feel much better! Love to you, Lizabeth

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